Monday, August 19, 2013

Summer Songs: "I Wish I Was Strong Enough To Lift Not One But Both Of Us"

The other night I really couldn't sleep. I had gone to bed, lights off and everything, but half an hour later I realized that it was futile {I either fall asleep right away or not at all}. So I did something I haven't done in a long time. I lit a candle {well, actually two}. I used to light candles all the time, but for some unbeknownst reason, haven't done it in quite some time. But I did. And I wrote in my journal by candlelight. It was quite picturesque. 

I was writing about humanity, believe it or not. It was just one of those weeks where people had let me down. My fault entirely. I put way too many expectations in the human person. I think life is a balance between 100% believing in someone and realizing that people are imperfect and human. Unfortunately, since I am an extremist, I tend to err on one side or the other. And this week was definitely all, "people are imperfect and human" {don't worry, I was judging myself the hardest}. 

It just sucks really. No matter how much we try, we are sometimes just not strong enough to do it. There is that age-old question of "do you think that people can actually change?". Sometimes I have weeks where my answer to that question is "not really". And then I'm stuck with questions such as "well, what is my role in all of this". Do we push each other to be better people even if we know the odds of failing and screwing up are stacked against us???

The answer . . . .


If we let these types of weeks and questions, consume us, we become bitter and cynical. Although I think it is healthy to maintain a realistic point of view on life and humanity, there comes a time where you just have to give the 63rd chance and believe in someone. I hate doing it. But if I don't believe in the people around me, how can I expect to be believed in myself? 

So this week, despite my discouragement and let down in humanity {myself included}. I have to find the strength {in God} to be strong enough to believe not only in myself but in the people around me. I think B.o.B. {featuring Taylor Swift}'s song "Both of Us" is the perfect anthem to such a goal. Let's lean on God in order to be strong enough for ourselves and the both of us.

Happy Monday!